May 2013
125 posts
poopflow:
ah yes i have finally found it
the g spot
The sad moment when you realize how alone you actually are. No one ever messages you first or texts you first or anything. So it gets to the point where you don’t want to put in the effort with people who don’t put in any effort for you, so you end up spending your life at home, never going anywhere.
Societal expectations of sex don't make any sense
fictionaladyfeels:
salmiakkivodka:
If dudes are expected to have a lot of sex
But ladies are expected to stay virgins until marriage
But homosexuality is bad
I’m really confused who dudes are supposed to be having all that sex with
#i’m not saying its aliens #but
Why Australia is officially the best country...
fromfictionwithlove:
People joke about Australia being a wacky, funny country but seriously…
The Australian government just spent $300,000 on a massive whale hot air balloon….With what appears to be 4 lovely sets of breasts. It is solely designed to look awesome and fly around the country side when they think the time is right.
I call your freedom and raise you a titwhale.
nickmoorexvx:
Yesterday a guy came up to me at work was like “How are you ever going to get a job with all those piercings?”
I’ll say that again.
A guy came up to me
at work
and asked “How are you ever going to get a job with all those piercings?”
eyeslikecominghome:
skin doesnt stain why aren’t we making clothes out of human skin
jebiwonkenobi:
When I was little I thought being an adult meant not having a bed time but I’ve come to realize that it just means being in charge of my own bed time and it turns out that I am not equipped to handle that responsibility.
Sext: I kiss you deeply as I lay you back gently on the bed, my hands roaming up your thighs, palms are sweaty, knees weak arms spaghetti
Person: How do lesbians have sex?
Me: The question is how do they stop.
woah bummer for everyone not making out with me right now
polaroid-pictures:
catsandcunts:
is anyone even aware of how difficult it is liking femme lesbians? like try to fuckin pick one out i bet you’ll reel in 3 hipsters and a straight girl
Try being the femme lesbian! I may as well be invisible! hahaha I’m tempted to just get, “Lesbian” tattooed all over my face.
lets-get-muddy:
I honestly just need someone who will lay in bed with me and keep me from over thinking things. I need someone who will calm me down and play with my hair until I fall asleep. I need someone to be here to catch me when I fall.
psychoticmist:
if you ever feel bad about yourself remember that george bush was once informed that 4 brazilian people were killed in iraq and he responded ‘how many is a brazilian’
cuddleswithhiddles:
cumberbatchkisses:
vvildrice:
Neil Armstrong was the first human being on the moon
Neil A.
Now say that backwards
wake up, America
If I'm comfortable with you, I'll:
jiidesu:
niicolodean:
call you names
tell you weird and personal details about myself
say “I NEED TO PEE” instead of just brb
type in caps a lot.
If i’m extra comfortable with you I’ll do all that and:
talk casually about porn and really perverted thoughts
share funny photos from my tumblr dash
actually tell you when i’m upset
try to make conversation with you
just generally act...
alexkisu:
helicoils:
i’m a massive sucker for girls with sleeves
you wanna ask me out now or later